I've found a friend who died for me

Today .. wait yesterday i was filled with regrets and shame and intended to hide myself and never speak a single word ever again .

okay let me explain what happen , i embarrass myself on stage . When i face my fear i actually got demoralize by myself . The thing is i tried my best to make my friends happy but my best isn't good enuf . All i ever wanted is for my friends to accept me and for them to be happy with me but i think all that is like a 5 year old kid dream that never came true . GRHH AT THAT POINT SUPER ANGRY BECAUSE ALOT OF THINGS STALL UP ! GONNA BURST !

Until , i felt God's love it's really how much He gave just for us . Looking at me and problem as compared to others and God's view i can tell its PATHETIC !

So i heard a preaching and testimony and the people who haven't met God are plenty full ! Really inspired to reach out ! So many people who are depress are finding for love and that peace ! People die without knowing God .

Life has been a pit hole for me . One day you may just wake up and thinking wow today is gonna be a great day ! But all of a sudden you may just step and fall into a pit hole of depression . Life is just surprising !

Thank you Lord , for placing someone there in my hardest period in life .

Here's how the story or testimony goes !

Got one of the hardest hits by life , so i was in my all time low ! I just keep receiving the blows and the worse part i had no one to share with . So i kept it for months ! Just so stressful ! No one to tell out ..

One day , just an ordinary day i met this girl on the "streets" so i "observe" her ! She look super pretty !! "As in really an angel that drop out of the sky !" Back to the story , I was with my group of friends so i looked at her she looked at me " Having our moment " ! Then she smiled , man she gave that sweetest smile ever ! So for the past half and hour i kept looking her and she looked back , the feeling " Marchiam Baik " !

Then the sad part came in , my friend got an eye on her so he talked to her . They talked for quite sometime , about 10mins + so he got her facebook ! Then wow the really really sad part came in , when we were about to leave , she asked my friend for a photo before she left ! JEALOUS T^T .

So a day later on facebook , my friend added her so i also added her ! (: So it took me a few days to finally chat with her ! (:

So that was turning point of my life , actually not really but still i chat with her for quite some time ! She taught me many things ! Man wanted to meet up with her so badly but by the time i wanted to , she left for her country ..

One of the things she taught me was that no matter how bad things are don't give up faith and to be cheerful always ! She is a living testimony she is positive no matter how bad is the situation , always caring for people ! And the last thing she taught me was about sacrificing, it may not seem easy but still if you care , you'll sacrifice bcuz that's what love is about . Action instead of words .

I didn't really got out of the situation fully but it really motivated me in life and i am standing up ! Yeahh ! Thank God that i met her !

STRESS @#$%^&

Ohh man , just feel so breathless like i'm gonna drown ! I have to put a great fight no matter what .. I need to cling on ! Today is like the US Black Friday when the whole entire market go crashing >>>> Downwards ! WHY DO THIS TYPE OF THINGS HAPPEN TO ME !

When everything seems so AWESOME at the starting of the day , like as in really the most AWESOME thing that ever happen but in the next hour man everything come crashing down in a split second , everything seems so mind blowing !

Why do the pass 3 years during the Christmas season the same thing happen ! It's repeating itself ! I'm sick and tired of it !

But encouraging words came to me (: , Good things fall apart so that GREATER can fall together ! Keep trusting in the Lord !

PRESS PLAY AND READ WHAT'S BELOW !

She sits at the table, the hours get later

He was supposed to be here

She's sure he would have called

She waits a little longer, there's no one in the driveway

No one's said they've seen him

Why is something wrong?

She looks back to the window, and suddenly the phone rings

A voice says something's happened

That she should come right now

Her mind goes to December, she thinks of when he asked her

He bent down on his knee first, and he said

"I want you forever. Forever and always. Through the good and the bad and the ugly. We'll grow old together, forever and always."

She pulls up to the entrance, she walks right to the front desk

They lead her down a million halls, a maze that's never ending

They talk about what happened, but she can barely hear them

She tries to keep a straight face as she walks into the room

She sits by his bedside, held his hand too tight.

They talk about the kids they're gonna have and the good life

The house on the hillside, where they would stay

Stay there forever, forever and always

Through the good and the bad and the ugly

"We'll grow old together, and always remember

Whether rich or for poor, or for better. We'll still love each other. Forever and always."

Then she gets an idea, and calls in the nurses, brings up the Chaplin

And he says a couple verses

She borrows some rings from the couple next door

Everybody's laughing, as the tears fall on the floor

She looks into his eyes, and she says

"I want you forever. Forever and always. Through the good and the bad and the ugly. We'll grow old together, and always remember, whether happy or sad or whatever. We'll still love each other, forever and always. Forever and always. Forever and always."

She finishes the vows, but the beeps are getting too slow

His voice is almost too low.

As he says "I will love you forever. Forever and always. Please just remember even if I'm not there. I'll always love you, forever and always."

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Man i am back to blogging !

I started to blog again cause i think i have to improve in my English and i hope that it will improve and i can finally let out my thoughts ! (:

So hows life for me ? Ermm i've been kinda bad and jealous .. Moving on i just feel like posting or writing what i've been through for my past one year but it's too long ! So much thing happen !

~SUMMARY~

Pass few months , just seeing all my friends really happy . It's a good thing but i just wish that time could just rewind ! But what i've learn for the pass few months is when the storms of life hits me nothing hits harder than it . But its not how hard it hit but its about how much i can get hit and keep moving forward despite the fact that the circumstances is almost impossible .

Treasure Fellowships .

Looking back at the time i spend with my 'BEST FRIEND' , i just wished i could treasure those time and spend just a little more time for you . But it kinda seems like its too late .

You were the only one who could tolerate my nonsense and my bad temper . Truly if i could i have one more fellowship with you i would thank you and i will treasure every single moment and i will never take it for granted .

What i learn in this ride was something ... It's kinda hard to explain but the point is once your friendship is gone it's quite hard to get it back ..

Both of us are now walking our own road but Friend all the best to you! I wish you are doing alright (: